


There Wolf, There Castle

by Mr_Pinniped



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Canon Compliant, Drabble Collection, M/M, Marauders, Monty Python and the Holy Grail - Freeform, Remus Lupin & Lily Evans Potter Friendship, Remus and Sirius Relationship, Remus is a Literary Nerd, Remus is a Muggle Film Buff, Rocky Horror Picture Show - Freeform, Werewolf Remus Lupin, Young Frankenstein, aladdin - Freeform, halfbloods and muggleborns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-25
Updated: 2018-01-06
Packaged: 2019-02-06 11:19:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12816387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mr_Pinniped/pseuds/Mr_Pinniped
Summary: Remus Lupin, Literary Nerd Extraordinare, enjoys Muggle films as well as wizard literature.  Other half-bloods and Muggle-borns sometimes join in the fun, much to the confusion of the pureblooded wizards.  Sirius sometimes tries to woo Remus by using things he learned from the Muggle films.  (Series of short scenes/drabbles)





	1. Chapter 1

**1975**

Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs shuffled out of the Forbidden Forest at dawn.Remus looked exhausted as he always did after full moon nights, but the other three were energetic.They had all successfully mastered the Animagus transformation, and this was the first full moon that they had accompanied Remus.Despite his exhaustion, Remuscouldn’t stop grinning as the other three helped him walk along as they left the forest and headed down the lake shore.

“What do you think, Rem?Up for some breakfast before we take you up to Pomfrey’s?”Sirius was saying, when James shushed them all, throwing the Invisibility Cloak over the four of them as best he could.

“It’s no good, boys.I already saw you.Also, Peter’s left leg is still showing.”Lily Evans called out to them, from where she was sitting on the edge of the lake with a stack of toast.James sheepishly removed the cloak.

Lily walked up to them.“Really, the four of you!You look like you’ve been out of bed all night!Gryffindor can’t afford to lose any more points!How many times have you been caught this year?”

“Fewer times than we were out,” mumbled Sirius, but he quieted as James elbowed him in the ribs. 

Lily crossed her arms.“Give me one good reason I shouldn’t tell a prefect I caught you.”

James cocked an eyebrow and indicated the new badge on Remus’s robes. 

“Ok, a REAL prefect!One who doesn’t sneak out in the middle of the night, just because his friends want him to!”

Remus sighed.Honesty was probably the best policy here.“Look, Evans.There’s ALWAYS one night a month I’m not in the dorms.Maybe you girls never noticed, but I couldn’t hide it from these three.Not for five years.”

Lily looked at him.It appeared she was thinking hard, counting days.Her voice quieted.“I’m top in Astronomy, you know.So yeah, I wondered.”

“It’s true,” said James.“And risking our lives to take care of our friend?Honestly, we should be EARNING points for Gryffindor.”

“Potter, no one asked you.” said Lily.She then turned to Remus.“I won’t tell anyone.I don’t want you to get hurt.”

She let them pass, just then, but that didn’t stop her from sidling up to Remus the next day at lunch, looking at him stoically, and saying “There wolf.There castle.”Remus burst out laughing, much to the confusion of Sirius, James, and Peter, none of whom had ever seen a Muggle film. 


	2. Chapter 2

**1976**

“Moooooooney? Mooney?You up yet?” Remus Lupin stretched and blinked as Sirius Black sauntered into the dormitory.He looked at the clock.It was just past 2 in the afternoon.

“Oh hey Pads.Back from Hogsmeade already?” 

“Yeah, James and Lily went off together and Peter finally got up the nerve talk to Marlene” Sirius nodded.“So I came to check on you.Since the full was last night, and you were too tired to come along.How are you feeling?”Sirius sat down on the edge of Remus’ bed.

“All right, now that I’ve slept.Still a little sore, but what can you do?”Remus curled his legs under himself to make more space for Sirius.

“So, you know that Muggle film? The one that was named after a snake.And King Arthur was there.But Merlin wasn’t.”Remus looked blank, so Sirius continued. “The one with the knight who looked weirdly like Nearly-Headless Nick?”

“Oh, you mean _Monty Python and the Holy Grail._ Yeah.”

Remus had seen the movie over the summer, with a small group of other half-bloods and Muggle-borns who attended Hogwarts.They would occasionally meeting during the summer to attend Muggle movies, read Muggle books, or catch up on news of the Muggle world that they had missed during the school year.Remus, being an avid lover of literature in all forms, had been delighted to join the group’s biweekly meetings when Lily Evans mentioned it just before the end of fourth year. 

After they finished watching _Holy Grail,_ Remus and Lily had met with James, Peter, and Sirius for supper.Peter had joined with news of the latest Gryffindor gossip.  
“I heard Thompson thinks we have a pet in the dormitory.”

“What, did he hear Sirius barking?” James had said.

“I think they’ve heard us talking about Remus’ “furry little problem” and they all think he has a very badly-behaved, foul-tempered rabbit.”

At the phrase “foul-tempered rabbit” Lily and Remus had burst out laughing, and refused to explain to the other boys why, until they dragged them to the theater and watched the film a second time.

“That’s the one.” said Sirius.“Anyway, did you know that Zonko’s is able to use owl post to get items from Muggle shops?”

“No,” said Remus, noticing for the first time that Sirius was clutching a Zonko’s bag and looking somewhat abashed. 

Sirius blushed and shoved the bag into Remus’ hands.Remus looked at him quizzically, then opened the bag.There was a small, white, fuzzy thing inside.He pulled it out.

It was a hand puppet of a rabbit with large fangs and red streaks dripping down its chin. It looked just like the killer rabbit from _Monty Python._  

“I reckoned you would like it.Something to encourage the rumors about the foul-tempered rabbit being your ‘furry little problem’.Plus it’s soft, and you can put a hot water bottle inside so when you’re sore after full moons you can be comfortable.And I figured I should get you something from Hogsmeade since you couldn’t come with us.Oh. And here’s the chocolate you actually asked for,” Sirius handed over a bar of Honeyduke’s finest.

Remus took the chocolate and grinned.He set the Furry Little Problem next to his pillow and curled up against Sirius’ chest, basking in the other boy’s warmth.

“Thanks Pads.You’re the best.”


	3. Chapter 3

**1995**

Remus woke to a tap outside of his bedroom window.He sat up, and noticed Sirius was not in the bed with him. _Please don’t have done something stupid again._ Sirius had spent the previous summer with him, but had run off towards Hogwarts as soon as he had heard that Harry’s name had come out of the Goblet of Fire.While Remus couldn’t entirely fault Sirius for attempting to make up for lost time as a godfather, but it hadn’t helped them in attempting to heal their fractured relationship.Still, Remus had been glad to see Padfoot when he had appeared at his door earlier that month, instructed by Dumbledore to return here.

Remus looked at the window towards the tapping sound. _Merlin, he IS doing something stupid._ Sirius’ face was peeking through the window at him, which would not have been terribly alarming if the bedroom was not on the second floor and the nearest tree was far across the yard.Also, Sirius seemed to be wearing… a white turban?

Remus crossed the room and opened the window.“What in Ptolemy’s name are you doing?”

Sirius grinned.He was wearing, in addition to the turban on his head, a loose-fitted pair of white trousers and a purple vest over an otherwise bare chest.He stood, arms akimbo, on a flying carpet.

“Uh… Sirius?Where did you get that?Aren’t flying carpets illegal in England?”

“I’m a fugitive, Moony!A street rat!A goof-off, no good!Gotta keep one jump ahead of the lawman!” The carpet rose a few feet, and Sirius extended his hand to Remus.“Do you trust me?”

“Sirius.Just because I showed you a Muggle film that I liked does NOT mean I want you to reenact it.”

Remus did sometimes enjoy Muggle literature and films- he had acquired a good cultural education from his mother, and had spent a few years working in his Muggle granddad’s bookshop after Wolfsbane potion had been invented, when he was able to work safely but stigma against werewolfs in the Wizarding world had made it hard to get a job, at least a steady and well-paid job.Now that Sirius was out of Azkaban, Remus had found that Disney movies were a good post-nightmare comfort, and had shared some of his favorites with Sirius- he had managed to get a Muggle VCR to function in his house- a piece of technology that had fascinated the pureblood.They had watched Aladdin a few days before, 

Sirius repeated himself.“Do you trust me?”

“Are you going to make me dress like Jasmine?” 

Sirius shook his head and smirked “Not unless you want to!”

Remus sighed and took Sirius’ hand.The darker-haired man helped him onto the carpet and sat down with his arms around Remus’ waist.Remus leaned into Sirius’ chest as the carpet began to rise to the level of the roof.As strange as some of Sirius’ ideas were, Remus still hoped to rebuild their relationship, and to help Sirius heal after Azkaban.Anyway, he couldn’t deny that a midnight magic carpet ride was romantic.

“Tale as old as time, true as it can beeeeeeeee….” Sirius started to sing.

“Wrong film, Pads.”

“But just as apt- I learned to truly love the Beast.And… he loves me in return, does he not?”

Remus turned his head and gently kissed Sirius.“Yes,” he said, “The Beast does love the Beauty.Though I’m afraid I won’t turn into a prince from kissing you.”

“Maybe I just haven’t kissed you enough times.You never know?”Sirius hazarded.

They tested this a few times,but, Remus continued to fail to turn into a prince.

“Ah well,” said Sirius.“You’re handsome enough as it is.”

And he pulled the carpet higher over the Welsh countryside, as Remus joined him in as many duets as they could think of until the first silvery light of dawn appeared in the sky.


	4. Chapter 4

**1978**

It was 11pm and Remus Lupin and Lily Evans sat in the Gryffindor common room studying for NEWT exams- Remus was checking over Lily’s practice Defense against the Dark Arts essays, while she evaluated his Potions assignment. 

“Y’know, I was thinking,” Lily said, breaking the silence, “After exams we should do something fun.As a group.”

Remus nodded.“Anything in particular you have in mind?”

Lily looked at him with a bit of mischief in her eyes.“Remember that terrible musical we saw a couple summers ago?”

“You mean the Rocky Horror Picture Show?” Remus asked. 

Lily grinned.“Well, it’s still showing in some theaters.But now they play the film at midnight, and everyone in the audience participates by yelling at the screen, throwing pieces of toast and playing cards, things like that.My sister and her fiancé went last month with some friends, and apparently she hated it, which means it must be fun.”

Remus chuckled.He had briefly met Lily’s sister Petunia when he and Lily were visiting over the summer and had never before met anyone else more annoyingly straight-laced. 

“Also,” Lily continued, “It’s become surprising popular among people with… non-standard relationships.I figured I could invite Marlene and Dorcas, and maybe you’ll meet someone?”

Remus gave her a reproachful look.“Just because I find gentlemen attractive doesn’t mean I’m going to snog a random Muggle I meet at a film.Besides, there’s my furry problem to think about.”

Lily shrugged.“Doesn’t mean you can’t ogle them.”

“I think maybe YOU want to do some ogling.It’s your idea.” Remus said.“But sure.After exams.

—————

Peter looked around.“Why is everyone wearing red fishnet stockings? Not that I mind, particularly, but I don’t think Muggles usually dress this way.”

Remus replied, “Peter, we’re at a theater just before midnight.We have a bag of newspapers and toast, there are multiple homosexual couples unapologetically walking around, and those girls appear to be writing on James’ face with lipstick.This is not usual Muggle culture.”

James turned around.A large red “V” was scrawled on his cheek.“They won’t believe me when I say I’m not a virgin!They just asked if I could sing the Time Turner song and when I didn’t know the song they said

“It’s called the ‘Time Warp’, mate,” Remus corrected.“It’s a jump to the left, a step to the right…. Never mind, you’ll see.And you’re a Rocky Horror Virgin- haven’t seen the film before.”

James looked puzzled, but nodded.“Where are the girls?We shouldn’t go in without them.”

“Um… they’re here,” said Sirius.Remus turned around.

Lily, Marlene, and Dorcas strolled through the door.All three were wearing high-heeled boots that looked impossible to walk in, red fishnet stockings, and black leather corsets that very effectively accentuated their curves.Lily strode directly to James and draped an arm over his shoulders.“Seems you’ve been marked already.Let me mark you again.” She kissed him on the cheek opposite the “V”, leaving a black lipstick print.“And that one won’t smear until I let you wash it off.”

James was speechless.

Sirius turned to Marlene and Dorcas, as if to say something, but Marlene interrupted him.

“My eyes are up here, Black.”

“I was just going to offer you some popcorn?”

“And drop it down her cleavage, no doubt,” Dorcas chimed in.“You’re like a horny dog, Sirius.”

“More than you’ll ever know,” Sirius said without missing a beat,“Oh, deer, is the movie about to start?Not to rat anyone out for being late but we’re going to have to wolf down this popcorn once we get into the theater.”

James, Remus, and Peter stared at him.“Oh Merlin, the puns are getting worse,” said Peter.

“Wait what puns?” asked Marlene.

“Never mind,” all four boys said in chorus.

Lily cooly took James’ arm.“C’mon, let’s go get seats.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I know that Rocky Horror premiered in 1975. I have no idea when the toast-throwing midnight showings became a thing, if some of the traditions I've seen at recent showings developed later, or if they were even popular in Britain and not just a US thing. But, it seemed like a film the Marauders should see, so here we are.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I may sporadically add more chapters as I think of more films I want Remus and co. to see.


End file.
